Available exclusively at the Silver Lake Café, Silver Lake, Minnesota
Volume II, Issue 4
***** Silver Lake Gazette Contributors
Helen Yost – my wife, owner of the Silver Lake Café Fritz Urke – semi retired plumber, regular customer at the Café Elissa Jane Karg – activist and author Mrs. Trygve Strindberg – President of the Silver Lake Historical Society Lisa Dauscher – librarian at Sleepy Eye High School Dr. Amy Wells – retired general practitioner and 44-year resident of Silver Lake The Theorist – not afraid to walk the fine line between genius and insanity Larry Yost – editor (LarryYostSLG@aol.com)
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*****Holiday Spirit
Many cultures have midwinter celebrations. Often, these celebrations are associated with the changing of an “old” year for a “new” year. The Chinese New Year is a time to honor one’s family and pay one’s debts. Rosh Hashanah is a reminder to Jews to cast off sins, learn from mistakes, and plan for a better tomorrow. On Shogatsu, the Japanese New Year, everything should be clean, no work should be done, and it is traditional practice to visit a shrine or temple. Christians celebrate Christmas to commemorate the birth of one of the greatest teachers our Earth has ever known. And America has a vast commercial extravaganza that is, oddly enough, also called Christmas. My favorite holiday activity happens at four o’clock on Christmas Eve Day. At the Old Norwegian Country Church, five miles south of town and overlooking Heidi Lake, the congregation gathers outside in the cold. No one turns on the heater or the lights. The front doors of the church are opened to an entryway beneath the bell tower. Pleasant conversation and laughter cut through the chill air. Clouds of condensation form with every breath. Then, at four, Elmer Forbord reaches up and pulls the cord. The ringing is heard for miles around. Everyone is welcome to ring the bell. A teenage girl laughs with joy. A four-year-old boy holds on to the bell rope while his father swings him up and down. A newly-married couple ring in their first Christmas together. When all have had their turn, we sing Silent Night. Then we go home and eat lutefisk and lefse. ---Larry Yost
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*****MOVIE REVIEW
I don’t get to too many movies. Of course they don’t make many good movies anymore. Not like Cool Hand Luke, The Dirty Dozen, The Magnificent Seven, or any cowboy movie with Clint Eastwood or John Wayne. From the ads I see on TV, the movies made these days are either touchy-feely crap, hi-tech animation specials, or action films that feature one of a billion variations of car chase scenes. Nevertheless, my wife dragged me out to see Garrison Keillor’s Prairie Home Companion movie. “I’m going to that move and I’m not going alone,” she informed me. So we spent the extra six bucks for a ticket so that I could buy a four-dollar bag of popcorn and a bottled water for $1.75. (They don’t even have a drinking fountain in the theater. What is this world coming to?) The movie wasn’t bad, though I can’t remember much of it. The best part was where Dusty and Lefty sang the song about bad jokes. I wish that I could remember the jokes – there were some real knee-slappers in there. That’s it for my movie review. You can look forward to another review the next time I go out to see a show, hopefully no sooner than the year 2010. ---Fritz Urke
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*****Mrs. Wordelman’s Hotdish
My son is 22 now, but in some ways he’ll always be twelve years old to me. One of those ways is his choice of favorite foods. He has already put in several requests for what he wants me to feed him when he comes to visit at Christmas. I got this recipe from a church cook book (thus the name of the dish) and it has always been one of Jason’s favorites. Brown one pound ground beef, one large chopped onion, and one cup sliced celery. Season with salt and pepper. Add one can cream of chicken soup, one cup milk, and two cups chow mein noodles. Top with bread cubes. Bake in a two quart casserole at 350 degrees for about 30 minutes. --Helen Yost
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*****Observations on cyber-dating
If as many people liked to take long walks along the shore as claim to in their on-line dating profiles, the beach would need traffic lights. If as many people liked to walk in the rain or cuddle in front of a fire, your broker would advise investing in umbrellas and firewood. What about the guys who submit photos of themselves straddling a great big Harley? Guess what guys—you may be trying to send a message of sexual prowess, but I see a guy who is saying, “I just got divorced and I’ m going to make sure the motorcycle is part of any new relationship.” No thanks. I don’t even open the profiles of the shirtless. No shirt, no shoes, no service. And what about the guys who can accept anything in a woman, as long as she is slender. They have literally filled out “no preference” in every single category (occupation, kids, education, likes, dislikes, etc.) except weight. You can be a shrew or a serial murderer as long as you are slender. (A male friend reports that women are most concerned with income.) My prowling of on-line dating sites yields the following recommendations: avoid sites like e-harmony that never ask daters what they do for a living, but ask a billion touchy-feely questions. (“I often carry the conversation to a new level.” “If a store-clerk gave me too much change, I might keep it without telling them.” “I am satisfied with my level of emotional development.”) Surprisingly, you can get a much better picture of a person with the standard questions (employment, income, who you live with, TV preferences, pets). Avoid any sites associated with Dr. Phil (Am I the only one who finds his slogan (“MindFindBind” vaguely sado-masochistic?). Some sites seem to attract certain kinds of people: more businessmen on Match. com, more aging hippies on Yahoo Personals. What everybody wants to know: Can you find love on-line? It’s a simple answer: yes. (Which leads me to another point: you might want to pay by the month.)
--by Elissa Jane Karg
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*****From The Past -- Historical news items gleened from the morgue of the defunct Silver Lake Pioneer-Commercial
December 15, 1991 – 15 years ago Miss Silver Lake, Lynn Jipson, will be a visiting queen at the St. Paul Winter Carnival from January 31 to February 3. Jipson is a sophomore at the University of Minnesota and is the daughter of Odella and the late Jasper Jipson of rural Silver Lake.
January 16, 1907 – 100 years ago A committee having in charge the arrangements for a married folks’ dance has issued invitations to married people only for next Monday evening. Older people in Silver Lake who enjoy the art of dancing will have the time of their lives. The 20th century young folks chopped the corners from so many of the good old square dances that older folks gradually lost interest. The coming event will be a revival of some of the best old time square dances with an occasional polka, oxford minuet, schottische, mazurka, etc. Two steps, three steps, four steps, and half steps have been eliminated. January 16, 1907 – 100 years ago Ghosts of good Catholic Xavier, of mighty Luther, of witty Wesley, of earnest Moody. What is Silver Lake coming to? In this edition will be found a letter from Dr. Burton Amundson containing an elaborate introduction to our readers of two Evangelists who begin work in Silver Lake next Sunday, February 11. This is to be a united effort made by all evangelistic elements of our city. We congratulate Silver Lake for this which churches are built, and for which their work is carried on has needed emphasis.
--compiled by Mrs. Trygve Strindberg
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Gals if you want to be free Just take a tip from me Get you a guy who’s a union guy And join the ladies’ auxiliary. --Woody Guthrie, 1940
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*****Elvis
I have sponsored a child in Nicaragua through Childreach -- now called Plan USA (www.planusa.org) --for twelve years. Elvis (Yes, my sponsored child’s name is Elvis!) is now in junior high school and likes soccer and math. I’ve been exchanging pictures and letters with his family since he was a baby. Every month I contribute $24 through a credit card deduction. That money helps the schools and health clinic in the community where Elvis lives. It buys his school uniform. It provides job training, small business loans and technical assistance to his family and their neighbors. The Plan organization works with children and their families in 60 countries all over the world, helping millions. They accept donations for special projects (disaster relief, major community developments, etc.) but the heart of their program are the one-on-one sponsorships like mine. I have committed to financial support and exchange of communication with Elvis until he is 18. By then, I hope that I will have helped to make a positive difference in his life. This is a good time of year to be thankful for all that we have and to realize that the more we give away, the more we will have. I encourage you to check out sponsoring a child through Plan USA. -- Dr. Amy Wells
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*****Exposure
His eyes are the color of sand At the rim of the shore The long and lingering divide Seems like a secret His eyes, soothing grains of sand Along the divide, always reaching To kiss the cool lake That laps at it Under a Texas sunrise
--Lisa A. Dauscher
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*****Twenty-two Questions
Each of the following statements has two possible responses: yes (I agree), or no (I don’t agree or don’t have an opinion). Take the survey with a friend. The chance that you will agree on everything is about one in four million.
1. Coke is better than Pepsi. 2. George Bush is a good president. 3. I love the Yankees. 4. The death penalty should be allowed in certain cases. 5. There is only one God, and that one God is composed of the Holy Trinity, and one of the Holy Trinity is called the Holy Spirit. 6. There are more Gods than just one, and one of the Gods is Vishnu, whose avatars include Krishna and Rama. 7. I like bananas. 8. Citizens should be allowed to possess assault rifles. 9. Democrats are weak on crime. 10. There was a conspiracy to kill President Kennedy, and that conspiracy has never fully come to light. 11. UFO’s and extra-terrestrial creatures have visited earth. 12. Men are better drivers than women. 13. Mohammed Ali was the greatest fighter who ever lived. 14. Carrot Top is funny. 15. I am willing to pay more taxes. 16. Tony Oliva was the Twins’ best player of all time. 17. Minnesota is better than Wisconsin. 18. Euthanasia is sometimes justifiable. 19. O.J. killed his wife and her lover. 20. Oprah is wonderful. 21. I never tire of hearing Dick Cheney talk. 22. Springsteen is better than Barry Manilow. -- The Theorist